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How to deal with other
people´s rude behavior

Wall Street Journal, by Elizabeth Bernstein

Original Article

Posted By:Hazymac, 7/1/2014 1:03:42 PM

I have been staying with my parents recently, while my house is being renovated. I have also been breaking out in hives. (Snip) Experts use the term "social allergens" to describe behaviors or habits that drive others nuts. Some of these actions begin to annoy us soon after we meet someone. Others get to us slowly and surely over time. Imagine a heehaw laugher. A knuckle cracker. A braggart who always tries to one-up you. A person who thinks loud belching is a compliment to the chef. As with a lot of allergies, it´s the repetition that gets to us.

Comments:
People tend to get locked into their little worlds, unaware of what they do habitually. Gum-smackers and -crackers are among the most irritating of people to be near. I also have a problem with people who whistle their S´s.

      


Post Reply  

Reply 1 - Posted by: Susannah, 7/1/2014 1:16:06 PM     (No. 9907099)

Amen, OP. My great dread in life is being stuck sitting next to a gum cracker on a long haul flight.

I´m not altogether sure that gum crackers are unaware that they irritate other people, as the author claims. I once read an interview with Diane Keaton in which she said she knew that her gum cracking drove people insane, but it gave HER pleasure.

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Reply 2 - Posted by: SoCalGal, 7/1/2014 1:20:32 PM     (No. 9907109)

Egocentrics. Braggarts who insert themselves into every subject they talk about so that we find out - oh so subtly - that they have been and are still experts at a sport or wine or (pick a subject)..... the list goes on and on. We all know tham. Recognize them. Avoid them.

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R-G1
  


 
Reply 3 - Posted by: Urgent Fury, 7/1/2014 1:48:58 PM     (No. 9907153)

common courtesy isn´t common.

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Reply 4 - Posted by: farmwife, 7/1/2014 2:04:36 PM     (No. 9907169)

Remember that ´Do unto others as you would have them do unto you´ thing.

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Reply 5 - Posted by: TunnelRat, 7/1/2014 2:26:05 PM     (No. 9907196)

Or is it "Do unto others before they do unto you"?

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Reply 6 - Posted by: SheikYerBooty, 7/1/2014 3:09:00 PM     (No. 9907249)

Didn´t Jesus say that #4?

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Reply 7 - Posted by: watashiyo, 7/1/2014 3:43:56 PM     (No. 9907298)

Wanna see rude? Experience unionized outfits like the hotel, city/state/federal facilities or even schools. You´ll know what lack of courtesies and rude is like.

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Reply 8 - Posted by: Pete Stone, 7/1/2014 3:48:04 PM     (No. 9907302)

No. 6: Matthew 7:12


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Reply 9 - Posted by: Pinchem, 7/1/2014 5:27:41 PM     (No. 9907459)

#2...some of us know that person. Within the comments here, in the 12 years I have been here I know every place they have been and know the names of important people they have personally fraternized with.

One phrase that used to drive me nutzo is the is the teenager saying "she goes" and "I go" and "she goes" and "I go" ad nauseum.

Working in radio and tv broadcasting I learned some great lessons. I broke the habit of "uhh", "and uh", "so" and other things between words or thoughts by just keeping silent and say those things to yourself and not out loud. They are annoying. An open microphone will cure you of cussing or saying something rude, thus I do the same when in public. I despise comedians who think they have to use 4 letter words to get a laugh. I did country comedy for years and never once ever used a 4 letter word. It just cheapens you when you do.

Another are people who show a complete lack of ethics, integrity, manners, courtesy and respect. Gosh I´d hate to meet their pathetic parents who couldn´t teach those values. I do the opposite, I respect everyone unless they prove they are too horrible and they don´t deserve it, like liberals who use the race card to hide their own racist hatred.


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Reply 10 - Posted by: dman, 7/1/2014 5:52:53 PM     (No. 9907484)

Thanks for a good laugh, OP. We´ve all encountered the "social allergens".

The article brings to mind Paul Simon´s lyrics:

It gets me agitated when I think that
You’re gonna love me now indefinitely
So good-bye, good-bye
I’m gonna leave you now
And here’s the reason why

I like to sleep with the window open
And you keep the window closed
So good-bye
Good-bye
Good-bye


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Reply 11 - Posted by: gillyo, 7/2/2014 1:09:56 AM     (No. 9907844)

#9 The "he goes" "she goes" thing used to drive my grandmother crazy. She cured me of it when I was a teenager when she told me that if they were "going" they wouldn´t be there to say anything.

The people that drive me craziest are the "everything revolves around me" types who have to turn every conversational topic into a monologue about themselves. I was once having a discussion about truffles with a co-worker and one of these people came up and started talking about how much he loved truffles and went on and on and one about the flavored ones and the different chocolates. After about 10 minutes of this my co-worker finally got a chance to interrupt and told him that we were talking about the other kind of truffle and then had to explain to him that we were talking about the kind of truffle pigs dug up. Sweet silence!

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Reply 12 - Posted by: suejeanne, 7/2/2014 1:34:28 AM     (No. 9907850)

Whenever possible, as a rule of thumb, I strive to simply ignore really rude people - life is too short to get overly agitated -
but if they get on my last nerve - and just won´t stay out of my hair, I think they ought to be impeached.

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Reply 13 - Posted by: Harvey, 7/2/2014 2:49:25 AM     (No. 9907863)

I used to know an individual who asked endless, personal questions about aspects of my life. Finally I put a stop to it by asking, in response to yet another inquiry, "Why do you ask, are you writing a book?" Silence. Blessed silence.

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