Tasha has the look of a young Britney Spears. With long, blonde hair, dressed in a bright pink skimpy top with skin-tight trousers and rather too much make-up, the 17-year-old appears a little too defiant, hard and knowing. But behind the posturing quivers a hurt little girl, still smarting from the day, as she describes it, ´Dad left Mum for another woman, abandoning us - innocent children with an idyllic family, or so we thought.´ Tasha is one of a number of children and young adults appearing in a BBC TV documentary shown tonight describing, with almost unbearable honesty, the
Comments: *shake you to the core
It´s about time.
Source corrected by staff; Headline corrected by staff
Where are the stories of children who live in a home with both parents miserably staying married? Better to grow up in a peaceful home with one parent. This silly joint custody crap that has kids spending 3 days with one parent and 4 days with the other doesn´t help them either. The kids don´t know if they are coming or going.
#1, I think most children would rather their parents stay together even if the marriage isn´t perfect. Of course, there are situations where divorce is the only solution. But people who leave the marriage because they have found their "soul mate," or who just want to "find themselves" need to realize and acknowledge that they are hurting their kids.
Respectfully, #1, it was our desire to avoid inflicting the things described in this article on our children that kept me & Mrs. Bambam together during the tough times that arise in every marriage. Having children changes everything.
Unfortunately, I had no choice after my ex, in a drunken rage, gave me a black eye that lasted 3 months. Then tried to break my neck in front of our 4 children all under 11. Don´t judge, you don´t know what goes on in other people´s houses.
Nobody´s talking about physically abusive marriages #5. #1 is simply incorrect in most cases. My parents argued, threw things, yelled...but I much preferred that to being raised by a single mom. Parents sometimes use the excuse of "the kids are better off" to justify their own bailing on their responsibilities.
My niece and her ex-husband married at 19 because she was pregnant. It was a mistake from day one. They remained married for seven years, producing two more children, until last autumn she had had enough of his abuse, both verbal and physical. I helped her leave him and get her divorce. I can tell you that watching what it did to her children still haunts me. I have a hard time dealing with my participation in the breakup of their home. I believe that marriage would never have lasted, but I still can´t shake the image of those three children during the last year as they have adjusted to a life as ping-pong balls one week and pawns the next. I have to agree with a previous poster: please take marriage seriously (and take sex outside of marriage seriously). It affects so many people, not just the husband and wife.
Our 13-year old granddaughter is devestated by the divorce of her parents 10 years ago. Every year she hopes this is the year she will have a real family with her Mom and Dad. If a parent dies, there is a finality and acceptance for the child. With divorce this is not possible -- it´s a thousand cuts each time she celebrates milestones or special events with only one parent present.
#5, #9 - You did the right thing. I´ve heard it said that the three As are the only real grounds for divorce - abuse, addiction, and adultery (which to me, addiction is a form of both abuse and adultery). My heart breaks for you.
#2´s word picture paints an excruciatingly accurate picture. Thank you.
My parents divorced before I was one, remarried before I was 3. I spent my entire childhood, living 9 months with Mother & stepfather, summers with Daddy and stepmother. I had a great childhood, learned independence at an early age amd also flexibility. I´ve always contended the way families are treated these days is the problem. You can´t have kids spend 3 days with one & 4 with the other. Or parents taking turns living in the house with the kids. Those are artificial ways to live. Of course the world did not revolve around children then either, I was expected to take my place in the families, not them to be "helicopter" parents....!!!
Marriage is a contract between a man, a woman and God. I fear most folks don´t understand that. If they did we would have fewer broken homes. As Charlie Daniels says "people have put their Bibles away".
I must agree with #5. My child witnessed more than one really bad physical attack on me and if it hadn´t been for my child the last attack (after the divorce in MY home) I wouldn´t have seen another day. If you don´t know the entire story, don´t judge.
Thankyou for your support ThelmaLou &Gramm - I know I´m violating the rules, but I plead being a loooong term LDotter - ok, ok, I´ll make a contribution as pennance. If I had not gotten out of the situation I would not haved lived to see my children grow up, graduate college, go into and excell in the USAF AND come back from two tours!!! See my five grandchildren and be a "Grandma" to them all!! You cannot ever understand someone´s decisions unless you know so much more than most are even willing to listen to. Do not judge based on appearances. I´ve met people I thought were dregs and found them to be wonderful, been wooed by rich influential men I found to be dregs? Life´s funny that way.
As a "child of divorce", no, the kids never get over it. Sorry. It´s just true. And, who I was is not the person I am. Some problems that came would not have been had I not had a father who cheated on my mother and left us. I wouldn´t have had to "raise myself" if my mother hadn´t have had to leave my brother and me at home alone while she went to work. I wouldn´t have felt so rejected if my father had loved me and my brothers enough to stay. Divorce, for most adults these days, is because of selfishness. I´m not speaking about abuse, of course. That is totally different!
Many years ago, a young pediatrician named Barringer put an open letter in the paper that was very moving. It was addressed to the parents who stay together for the sake of the kids. He wasn´t for it because he saw the damaged kids come into his office.
That was then, but today you have to wonder how many kids are so spoiled that they are upset for their own selfish reasons and afraid the gravy train of ´stuff´ will end.
You can always tell a Harvard man; he’s the one with a series of scarlet A’s on his report card. This week, Harvard’s Dean of Undergraduate Education Jay M. Harris admitted to the university newspaper, the Harvard Crimson, that the most common grade for Harvard students is an A. What’s the median grade? Would you believe A-minus? The reason Harvard is coming clean about its grade inflation is that they were prodded by professor Harvey C. Mansfield, who said in the Crimson that the inflated grades at the university are “indefensible … a failure on the part of this faculty
Texas Lieutenant Governor David Dewhurst announced a Texas-led three-week effort that he says reduced illegal immigration, smuggling, and human trafficking to a standstill in the Rio Grande River section of the U.S./Mexico border. The Lt. Governor spoke with me in an interview for Breitbart News; he stated: “In the Rio Grande Valley sector, nearly nothing moved in those three weeks. We shut it down. We had teams of Texas law enforcement in the brush, high altitude aircraft, gun boats, and more," he explained. “Our intel revealed that the Gulf cartel was growing frustrated with our three-week effort.” “The border issue is just
Last month, the New Yorker made rare sport of its fellow leftists, by featuring on its cover Kathleen Sebelius crossing her fingers, a pensive looking Barack Obama with Gordon Gekko’s giant mid-’80s brick of a cell phone, and a pocket protector-wearing young nerd (Jay Carney?) inserting into a White House computer equipped with a sclerotic CRT monitor, yet another piece of technology from the early pioneering days of personal computers, a floppy disk. As Malcolm Muggeridge noted a half century ago, there is no way for any satirist to improve upon real life for its pure absurdity. Yesterday, the New York
The FT’s former correspondent at the European Parliament used to ask me the same question at every press conference. “So does this mean you voted the same way as Jean-Marie Le Pen?” It’s amazing how many people want to judge a proposal, not by its merits, but by its incidental supporters. We need only state their implication openly – that you should drop an otherwise sensible idea because someone you don’t like agrees with you – to see how absurd it is. Yet people carry on doing it. It’s the phenomenon that lies behind Godwin’s Law, the observation that all Internet discussions,
WASHINGTON — As the Obama administration continues the aggressive public defense of the Affordable Care Act it began this week, the president will get some help from his former chief congressional lobbyist, Phil Schiliro, who is returning temporarily to the White House almost exactly two years after he left. Mr. Schiliro’s job, which is expected to last a few months, is to help protect the health care law from legislative attacks by repeal-minded Republicans in Congress, and to quiet dissent from politically vulnerable Democrats seeking to distance themselves from the law and the president ahead of the midterm congressional elections.
What a difference a week makes. Seven days ago, ABC turned over its Thanksgiving night programming slot to shock artist Lady Gaga, and the singer´s surreal pairing with the family-friendly Muppets flopped as a result. Last night, a three-hour, live remake of the wholesome classic The Sound of Music scored a huge audience for NBC, bringing it the kind of ratings success it rarely sees on a typical Thursday night. Fast National returns have The Sound of Music averaging a 4.6 rating among adults 18-49 and 18.47 million viewers. Easily the most-watched program of the night, it tied CBS´ The Big Bang Theory
We hear relatively often these days about the large and growing Muslim communities in major European cities. Less frequently a subject of media attention in the U.S., however, is an equally significant phenomenon: the asylum centers that dot the landscape in many countries. In Norway alone, with a total population of only five million, there are a hundred or so such establishments around the country, some of them in largish cities, some in rural hamlets. In these centers reside individuals of foreign origin, mostly from the Muslim world, who are awaiting decisions about their applications for asylum. The places aren’t
Federal airline security oversight has a long track record of failure. Few people know that prior to Sept. 11, 2001, four different federal agencies -- the FBI, CIA, FAA and INS -- were entrusted to protect commercial airlines. They clearly did not do their jobs. Why, then, has the federal government further nationalized the process? After the 2001 terrorist attacks, Congress rushed to create a new agency to protect America´s planes, trains and trucks. The Transportation Security Administration enabled the federal government to control the screening of passengers and baggage at all but five of the 429 U.S. commercial airports. Eleven
David Horowitz: I had this idea. Well, the first thing is that I didn’t want to duplicate what was already being well done on the right. But one of the things — there were a couple of things that I saw missing. One was addressing the culture that the Left had infiltrated and subverted. I picked three areas where the Left had made their major gains. One was public broadcasting, another was education, and the third was Hollywood. That’s how I began thinking — where does the Right need some force? Now, the second was I saw that conservatives are, as
The leftward tilt of American universities is a nightmare. But at least American college students have places to turn to – groups like the Foundation for Individual Rights in Education, and websites like Minding the Campus – when things get blatantly unjust or just plain unbearable. But what can college students in a country like the Netherlands do when they want to push back against professorial PC? Meet Yernaz Ramautarsing. Born in the former Dutch colony of Surinam in 1987, he was raised in Amsterdam – and grew up into a political junkie and a solid left-winger. “I was terribly left-wing,”
This is not a return to Diana West’s book. However, Andy McCarthy, a man for whom I have very great respect and whom I like very much, has written a review of it in The New Criterion that, because of its revisionist presentation of a number of historical events, is among the most discouraging political documents I have read in many years. (Snip) First is Andy McCarthy’s view that the scandalous, cowardly refusal of the mainstream elite of American culture and politics to recognize that America’s Islamist enemies are enemies can be traced to Soviet infiltration of the U.S. government
Amy (not her real name) sat in my office and wiped her streaming tears on her sleeve, refusing the scratchy tissues I’d offered. (Snip) It became increasingly difficult to balance school, socializing, laundry, and a part-time job. She finally had to dump the part-time job, was still unable to do laundry, and often stayed up until 2 a.m. trying to complete homework because she didn’t know how to manage her time without her parents keeping track of her schedule. I suggested finding a job after graduation, even if it’s only temporary. She cried harder at this idea. “So, becoming an
Last summer on his $100 million family tour of Africa, Barack Obama hoped for a priceless photo op with Nelson Mandela, the ailing freedom pioneer who went from prison cell to the presidency of South Africa. Mandela´s family suggested that wouldn’t happen. So, the Obamas did a photo op in Mandela´s former prison cell. Which Obama’s White House quickly tweeted upon word of the icon´s passing at 95. [Skip] But Obama was also caught staring at television coverage of Mandela’s passing, which became Obama’s Photo of the Day.
More young men in California rise in pitch at the end of their sentences when talking, new research shows. This process is known as "uptalk" or "valleygirl speak" and has in the past been associated with young females, typically from California or Australia.But now a team says that this way of speaking is becoming more frequent among men.The findings were presented at the Meeting of the Acoustical Society of America in California. "We found use of uptalk in all of our speakers, despite their diverse backgrounds in socioeconomic status, ethnicity, bilingualism and gender," said Amanda Ritchart, a linguist at the University of
The most curious thing of all about the November jobs report released on Friday was the huge drop in the unemployment rate — and the fact that the Labor Department chose not to disclose that the data going into that figure are under investigation for falsification. On Nov. 19, I broke the news in my column that the Census Bureau, which collects data that goes into the jobless rate on behalf of Labor, had caught one of its enumerators fabricating interviews in 2010. The culprit said back then (and to me during an interview) that he was told to do so by
DAVID CORN: I saw a president who remains frustrated with the political-media culture that he has to work within, and that he´s looking to rally people, students here, and supporters, and people within the media. CHRIS MATTHEWS: But David Corn, you skeptic. He came to us today. He came amongst us. CORN: He´s trying to rally people behind this vision that he´s been promoting for a couple years. FINEMAN: By the way, he did it the end here, today, Chris, not by defending specifics, but by explaining why he´s in the game to begin with. And I don´t know about you, he´s
Speaker John Boehner said his party should support gay Republican congressional candidates and urged his colleagues to “be a little more sensitive” when running against women. “Some of our members just aren’t as sensitive as they ought to be,” Boehner said. When asked if he thinks his party should support gay candidates, Boehner simply said: “I do.”
Denver - A baker who refused to make a wedding cake for a same-sex ceremony must serve gay couples despite his religious beliefs or face fines, a judge said Friday. The order from administrative law judge Robert N. Spencer said Masterpiece Cakeshop in suburban Denver discriminated against a couple "because of their sexual orientation by refusing to sell them a wedding cake for their same-sex marriage." The order says the cake-maker must "cease and desist from discriminating" against gay couples. Although the judge did not impose fines in this case, the business will face penalties if it continues to turn away gay
7. On the U.S. war with Iraq: “If there is a country that has committed unspeakable atrocities in the world, it is the United States of America. They don’t care for human beings.” Via cbsnews.com 6. On Israel: “Israel should withdraw from all the areas which it won from the Arabs in 1967, and in particular Israel should withdraw completely from the Golan Heights, from south Lebanon and from the West Bank.” Via jweekly.com 5. On the U.S. war with Iraq: “All that (Mr. Bush) wants is Iraqi oil.” Via cbsnews.com 4. Mandela on Castro and the Cuban revolution: “From its earliest days, the Cuban Revolution has also been a
In February, the Bush family’s personal emails were hacked by Guccifer, a hacker who uncovered photographs of former President George H. W. Bush in a hospital bed and George W. Bush’s oil paintings in the process. It seems Guccifer has struck again, this time targeting former President Bill Clinton and the Clinton Library. The hacker has reportedly uncovered doodles of Clinton drawing on what were, at the time, classified documents. Among the doodles is apparently a picture of a penis. The document uncovered is a briefing of the strategic measures the United States could take prior Clinton’s decision to intervene in
Former President Bill Clinton shared an anecdote regarding Nelson Mandela and the aftermath of his impeachment Friday on CNN. Clinton revealed shortly after the “impeachment business” finished on Capitol Hill, Rep. Henry Hyde (R., Ill.) who managed the impeachment trial requested a meeting at the White House. The former president granted the meeting out of lessons of humility and forgiveness he learned from Mandela, he said: BILL CLINTON: I remember one day, oh, about a month after the whole impeachment business was over, Henry Hyde, who had run the whole show, unbelievably enough, maybe a few months after, it was
One definition of a pathological liar is someone who lies where the truth would serve just as well. When President Obama’s uncle, Onyango Obama, was arrested in 2011 for drunk driving, the truth — that Obama had stayed with his uncle years earlier for several weeks as a Harvard law student — would have served the president just fine. No potential Obama voter would have held it against him that an uncle he had stayed with two decades earlier was picked up for DUI. Yet the White House went with a lie, claiming that Obama had never met his uncle. Now that
Many people could die as extreme weather becomes common. There will be more freak winds like the October storm, which killed four people. Heatwaves will be lethal and the sea level will rise, leaving coastal towns at risk of being swamped by storm surges. Sir Brian Heap, president of the European Academies Science Advisory Council, said he felt “obliged” to issue the warning after a new study by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change. It comes on the back of Typhoon Haiyan in the Philippines, which has killed more than 5,000 people. Sir Brian said: “Given the tragic events this
The New York City Police Department (NYPD) is sending out letters telling gun owners to turn over their rifles and shotguns — or else face the consequences. New York City’s ban on rifles and shotguns that hold more than five rounds is now being enforced, according to a letter the NYPD is sending out to targeted city gun owners. “It appears you are in possession of a rifle and/or Shotgun (listed below) that has an ammunition feeding device capable of holding more than five (5) rounds of ammunition. Rifles and shotguns capable of holding more than five (5) rounds of ammunition are