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23 Rules of the Office Holiday Party
Wall Street Journal, by Jason Gay

Original Article

Posted By:StormCnter, 12/10/2012 11:02:15 AM

You may ask yourself: What´s a story about the company holiday party doing in the sports section? Excellent question! It is hard to compare the annual workplace December celebration with, say, the Olympics, unless the Olympics have a competition for eating too much cheese and sugar cookies while listening to Mariah Carey. But a company holiday party is indeed a sport. Think about it! You worry if you´re prepared. You worry about the venue. You panic about your outfit, like a nervous Tom Hanks descending the staircase in an all-white tuxedo in the movie "Big."

      


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Reply 1 - Posted by: mitzi, 12/10/2012 11:15:44 AM     (No. 9057699)

Do they still do holiday office parties? I retired from a major corporation (Wall Street) in 2010 and it was at least 10 years since the last big company party.

We had small departmental cocktail parties or dinners. Home by 80 pm.

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Reply 2 - Posted by: prescient33, 12/10/2012 11:28:16 AM     (No. 9057714)

My crowning achievement at an NLRB Regional Office office party in ´62 was to deck my boss after he called me a "shanty Irish b*@%*d." It took two shots-he went down on the first blow, but the dope got to his feet too soon.
The next day he came in sporting a shiner behind sun glasses, and never mentioned the incident again-not a word, and we remained good friends until the day he died six years later (in a tragic house fire.)

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Reply 3 - Posted by: viking diver, 12/10/2012 11:31:41 AM     (No. 9057720)

haven´t had an office party since 2000 when the new CEO took over, they use to be pretty nice, dinner crazy gift exchange, dancing and they even paid for baby sitting and taxi´s home for those who had a few to many adult beaverages. now if we send out a group Merry Christmas we are given a warning by the HR grinches.

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Reply 4 - Posted by: bldrrepub, 12/10/2012 11:51:50 AM     (No. 9057752)

As the owner of a small startup, the Christmas party will include a couple of martinis, a nice cigar, a shower, and then bed.

All under the same roof.

Well, except for the cigar part; the wife doesn´t like the smell. I´ll do that on the patio.

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Reply 5 - Posted by: joew9, 12/10/2012 11:58:32 AM     (No. 9057764)

Ours is always; open area of the warehouse where the echo is unbearable, forklift grease on the floor so you have to clean your shows afterwards, overdone burgers, dried out bread, hotdogs that have split open because they were cooked so long(yes, hotdogs and burgers for Christmas), PA system blasting rap music so loud you can´t hold a conversation, loud ear covering speeches from management that are nothing but MBA platitudes, attendance way down because the whole thing is so unpleasant. And year after year the Japanese management just doesn´t get the message. Something about their culture that they just don´t know how to give a big party. And apparently ours doesn´t know how to make a profit because our stock is in the toilet.

I work in private industry (non government, non government crony contract) and in my whole career never been treated but to one office party back in 1984.

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Reply 6 - Posted by: chumley, 12/10/2012 12:21:27 PM     (No. 9057801)

My most memorable was a squadron Christmas party held at a local drinkery with a restaurant tacked on. Unbeknownst to us, the cook had walked out in a huff just before showtime. In a panic the owner just grabbed whoever he could find to cook.
Everyone who had the gravy ralphed for hours.

In another one I brought Mrs C and a gorgeous friend. We told everyone she was my other wife. Won two door prizes (one for each) and became a minor legend.

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Reply 7 - Posted by: Starfire, 12/10/2012 12:55:23 PM     (No. 9057860)

Having been ‘raised right’ (Thank you, Daddy!) I always knew how not to embarrass myself at any business event. Daddy’s rules were shorter and simpler than the author: 1.) Wear your name tag on the right side so it’s easy to read when shaking hands, 2.) Hold your drink in your left so your handshake is always warm and dry, 3.) Never drink more than one drink every two hours and drink plenty of water in between and 4.) Know when it’s time to make your polite excuses to leave.

Now I’m retired but my daughter has a nice solution to the office party problem. She telecommutes and her ‘office’ is 700 miles away. While her office mates are dealing with the drama of the office party, she will be sipping eggnog with the family. Believe me; she won’t miss the shrimp bar one bit.


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Reply 8 - Posted by: Sfacheem, 12/10/2012 1:09:22 PM     (No. 9057883)

My wife´s company had an after-hours formal holiday party that went ´till all hours at which there was alcohol served and dancing.

And spouses were not invited.

Is it me or is that just wrong?

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Reply 9 - Posted by: mickturn, 12/10/2012 3:01:44 PM     (No. 9058096)

In reality the only rule is... "We have no rules!"

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Reply 10 - Posted by: smcchk, 12/10/2012 3:43:23 PM     (No. 9058171)

I would say "yes", #8.

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