Fox News commentator Dana Perino suggested during a live broadcast that female victims of domestic violence should ´make better decisions´ to avoid getting hurt. Perino made the remark during a discussion on the murder-suicide of NFL player Jovan Belcher, who shot and killed his girlfriend before turning a gun on himself. For months prior to the shooting, the couple had been having problems and police had previously been called to their home as a result. Fox commentators were discussing the implications of the crime and whether laws governing gun rights should be reexamined in the aftermath.
Comments: There sure is no shortage of "outrage" in this country over statements that are innocuous, especially when it comes to Republicans. Her statement was correct. Some women should make better decisions if they chose to stay with someone who is physically or verbally abusing them or treating them horribly.
Dana was telling the truth and the libs´ heads exploded. Notice how hollyweird is remaking history thru their disgusting films: the latest is to make FDR out as a sex freak. They lie in school and thru their films so that bad is good and evil is fine. Then scream at Rs or conservatives when we tell the truth that evil is evil and must be stopped. We need to take back the culture.
Dana looks beautiful in the first photo, then there is a rather unflattering shot alleged to he she, but it doesn´t look like her at all. Look at the remarkable photo of the happy family, the football guy who shot his girlfriend, she holding their 3 month old. Baby almost looks like she saw it coming. Quite an expression for an infant.
Anyone who´s ever had a female friend or family member in a chronically abusive situation knows how hard it is to convince the abused woman to leave. I´ve witnessed long cycles of abuse/remorse/honeymoon/rising tension/repeat abuse and tried to convince the women to leave during the "good" times - it´s almost always a losing fight. IOW - I´ve tried to convince them to make better choices for themselves. Eventually, the women got out - when they made a good decision to leave. Obviously the main fault lies with the abuser, but those who are being abused bear the responsibility to leave once they know the relationship is violent.
Clearly, Dana Perino knows the real deal. As usual, because of her politics, she´s being vilified for speaking the truth.
You don´t have to be a lib to be offended by Dana Perino´s comments. I am offended....I am conservative but I believe when you are in an abusive situation it isn´t always as easy as it sounds to seperate yourself from that situation especially when children are involved. If you are in that situation and you find the strength and courage to get out of it GREAT but don´t criticize those that are not able to do that when they fall victim to their abuser.
There is much truth in Dana´s statement. Many women continually go back to someone who abuses them. Many women are drawn to the "bad boy" personna and get caught in the abuse and maybe-it-won´t-happen-agian cycle. Check out Mia Hamm´s decisions if you desire a poster child.
Some women are trapped in abusive marriages because they have no ability to support themselves or their children, although the Feds will fall all over themselves to support a "single mother." We´ve all seen the articles that a single mother making $29,000 and collecting benefits nets the equivalent of a women making $69,000.
Dana is right though - a man (or woman) who hits you once will hit you again if you stay. Such relationships are not worth salvaging.
Yes, women should stop dating the abusive type. Sometimes, they just don´t know. I get what she was trying to say and feel that those who are criitcizing her are only considering the % whose spouse covered up tendencies well.
I don´t know the circumstances of this case but do know that most cases of violent death caused by a spouse are preceded by many previous assaults often resulting in restraining orders. How do you protect someone who keeps returning to a spouse that beats them?
I´m not a fan of Perino, but in this case I agree 100%. For men and women, choose your partner carefully. It´s called common sense, and we have a shortage of it in our country-- especially among liberals.
This is not blaming the victim. That would be pointless.
But there are signs that men are controlling, have short tempers, and are abusive - either verbally or physically. A psychologist once told me that when a man throws or breaks objects (particularly objects that the woman values), or breaks down a door (or puts his fist through a window as Belcher had done in college when irritated with a woman), he is already a threat to her safety.
Women who value themselves do not usually get into these messes. It has nothing to do with their monetary worth. Mary Kennedy may turn out to have been killed by Robert Jr. after a long history of controlling behavior and verbal abuse. And heaven knows what else.
#16 has it right. You don´t marry these guys and have kids and THEN wake up and realize that you are being abused. The signs are usually there all alone. Young women have to learn to recognize them - they can be subtle. Controlling behavior is sometimes interpreted as flattering, "he really cares". It is not flattering. It is controlling behavior. And it is not far from controlling behavior to abuse.
Only the Media and the Left decide who is right or wrong. Personal Responsibility is unheard of in either culture. Dana is great love her, she brings back a dignity to reporting.I look forward to the FIVE every day.
Generally speaking of course a MAN will pick a woman and hopes she never changes. A woman will pick a man and hope she can change him. The more ISSUES the POS has the greater the challenge. Generally speaking of course.
I´m outraged at the lying leftist continual outrage to truth. Yes, it is ultimately the fault of the abuser. However, for years and years and years, case after case in the 100´s of thousand women have been killed at the hands of their abusers. In nearly every case(except in the Mulim world) it is/was in no way the first time the abuse occurred. If women continue to stay with any person that has been abused them once, they have some culpability in what ultimately occurs in that relationship. What bothers me even more (as these women make their beds) is the children that die at the hands of these abusive jerks. These children are innocent and ultimately any mother that leaves her child with these type individuals should´nt be allowed to keep their children, nor have any more.
Been involved with a lot of domestic violence "situations". There is plenty of help out there, plenty of services, counseling, etc available to the victims and their families. Dana is correct in her statement. Had one apartment that was a "will call" every Saturday night between 10 pm to 3 am. Would separate, take him to jail, she would show up 15 minutes after he was processed in to the unit, begging and crying for "us" to let him out, it wasn´t his fault he just had a bad day. It went on for about six months. He decided one night after beating the living snot out of her to go after their 10 year old daughter. She caved his skull in with a cast iron skillet. During the trial her defense attorney played the victim card..and the judge said no because in the file was all the times we had been sent out there. all the help she was offered and refused. A no win situation for her because she wouldn´t walk away...not that she couldn´t...
Dana is right. The excuses abused partners give are appalling. Oh, he is so sorry, he will never do it again, she is so sweet when she isn´t drunk, I just need more time to change him. We´re staying together for the sake of the children... We provided an emergency "safe home" for victims of domestic abuse for several years, and we heard ´em all. The woman who sat in my kitchen midmorning eating her custom-made breakfast,, smoking, not lifting a finger, while her monster kids destroyed my house, was almost a victim of violence again. good thing my cast iron skillet wasn´t at hand, I calmly suggested through gritted teeth, the third time, that my allergies required that she step outside in the snow to indulge her addiction, that she take immediate steps to corral her boys, and that we would be making other arrangements Right. Now. for more comfortable housing while she got her life sorted out. Argggh. That said, ´Just leaving´ is incredibly hard for many abused women. Welfare takes time to process, deposits for rent and utilities add up fast, education is often limited, and these women have often been so tightly controlled for so long, there is nothing left. No money is the least of their problems. We did see the occasional success story, but for every one of those courageous and determined people who decided that was no way to live, there were a dozen who went back for seconds and thirds,
I really think a fundamental non-understanding of what real honest to goodness men are and should be is the root of this cycle of abuse. The whole alpha/beta dynamic.
Women mistake physical violence for true strong alpha characteristics. An abuser is not alpha. Alphas don´t have to physically control and abuse to have women, they just have women, period, because they are alpha. An abuser is a beta.
Physical violence denotes a need to control in the extreme what little you have "control" over generally. THAT is not alpha. That in the end is the behavior of a pitiful complete beta that instead of alpha-ing up and working on why he is a loser and how to get more alpha in his life, he takes out his anger and frustration on the weaker people in his life that he can overpower and thus never has to address his obvious shortcomings. Why else would real men in the past and now be so repulsed and even violent toward these cowardly beta abusers? I know my grandfather and his brothers were known to go with the other men in their country town to inform one of these beta abusers that he better man up and stop beating her or they would make sure she never had to worry about him again. Sound familiar?
As to Perino´s statement, yes, women need to stop chasing and accepting pure betas, period. Never healthy. Leads to violence and resentment, even hatred on one or both sides. Men for marriage or LTR´s need to be a balance of alpha and beta, the balance that makes them just the right amount of supportive yet decisive and strong man they are meant to be. Just my .2.
I agree that the women involved should make better decisions, but most of them do not have that ability.
I was abused--not physically, but mentally--from the day I was born. Once when I was small, to avoid "hitting a child" my mother turn and began beating a kitchen cabinet until the door broke. She did not "hit" me, but I felt every blow. It began when I was so young I had no reference point to be able to discern that it was wrong, or that being abuse free should be normal.
My first husband abused me while I was working along side him, 11 hours a day as a heavy equipment operator, earning a "man´s wage," yet I only left him after he hit my son.
All through school, in the 60s, no one mentioned abuse. I attended church every Sunday, yet never had anyone talk to me about abuse or my constant depression. I had no one to tell me that I was capable of making "better" decisions.
Now, there are many sources of help available, for families, for women, even for young teenage girls with abusive high school boyfriends.
After years of therapy, my last husband (may he rest in peace) was an angel of a considerate man, but if I had met him when I was 18 or 21 or even 25, I might have been incapable of making the "better" decision where he was concerned.
She is 100% correct. Every day women have to make decisions about their safety. Making the decision to be a victim is not an acceptable option, especially when children are involved.
Back in the 80’s I helped move and hide a woman from a drunken, abusive husband twice. The second time the kids climbed out a window and ran to a neighbor’s while he shot up the inside of the house. My family risked our safety to keep her and her three children hidden and safe. She was a college professor and he was unemployed, yet she returned to him both times with her children in tow. When she asked for help a third time, I worked with child protective services and her parents to keep the kids safe, but she was on her own.
In domestic violence, the abuser is guilty of a crime. If the violence continues and the victim stays in the situation, the victim is also guilty… of poor judgment. Moreover, in cases where children are involved, the non-violent parent is guilty of an abusive level of neglect for subjecting the child to the other parent’s violent rages.
#33 has it right. I have been there, done that. Abusive parents who had me convinced that I couldn´t do anything right, pushing me into marriage at age 19. Yes, he was controlling, but that was the "normal" for me. He became physically abusive and I had no where to go (in the 60s nothing was available)..I left when he went after my child. I was threatened that I would never see the child again, I had no job, no skills, no money. It took a lot of counseling before I learned that I DID indeed have choices and did not have to stay in that situation. I left and have been happy ever since. Women in these situations DO NOT realize they have a choice. Please try to understand..the old "why don´t you leave him" question is no help at all.
Sorry # 36 for your past woes. But that no longer cuts it as not a viable option, especially when children are involved. Not only is leaving the only option, if you have to move to Canada and save yourself and your children...there is all kind of help now. In present day there is no excuse for staying with an abuser of ay kind.
I do think the mindset to not tolerate abuse is something that is best instilled years before a girl is old enough to date. Luckily for me my dad drilled into me from a very early age that if a man ever raises a hand to me, I´m to leave him immediately. Being of a faith that says the only excuse for divorce is adultery or abandonment, that´s one of the few instances I would have no qualms going against what I believe the Bible teaches & I think his early instruction is the reason. He had a much-beloved baby sister he had to rescue from an abusive situation & in his dying days sometimes referred to me by her name (I took it as the compliment it was).
I agreed with Dana when I heard her say it. The real Fox News scandal is that they have muzzled Morris and Rove because they both want to talk about the massive voter fraud that gave the election to Obummer.
Of course liberals are outraged. They want women to be dependent on government, so for liberals it´s more important that women stay in sicko relationships with psycho males and depend on the government to sort out the various consequences. Planned Abortionhood makes lots of money from the government for aborting all their unwanted babies. Employment security for social workers, WEAVE, and other Free Stuff dispensers.
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